The whole idea of writing a blog plays with my head badly. On the one hand, the whole struggle to figure out what to write about and secondly the insecurities that creep into my mind about my ability to write and who would want to read about what I do sets me up for a few days of anxiety. I feel I then become the diversity student who requires a topic with sentence starters to begin.
I have found that working at St Luke’s Catholic College one has to be comfortable with the uncomfortable and writing blogs is one of those things that makes me incredibly uncomfortable. My process, or perhaps lack of sees me a week out from when my blog is due asking around for topics – Why? Because who would be interested in what I do?
I see teachers new to St Luke’s who are making their way through the maze of learning so many new things, who benefit from little suggestions that I make to improve their practice. These teachers who are so new to this vocation take this little jewel of knowledge and use it to their best advantage. I need to follow their example and grow in confidence. We all need to bloom where we grow!!
The night before the Blog is due I start to feel the rush of adrenaline through my body – could be stress but I am going with adrenaline – glass half full!!
I think it is time for me to get my head out of the sand and move from being the diversity student suffering from anxiety that needs to back herself and know that I do good “stuff” in the classroom.
I know that Hope is not a strategy but so far in 2020 it’s been keeping me going. My goal (not sure if it’s short term or long term) is to write a wicked blog!! It might take a while, but I will get there!!